


even still

by herwhiteknight



Series: inktober 19 [3]
Category: RWBY
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Nonbinary Character, it's blake. nonbinary blake is a headcanon that is very dear to me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-26
Updated: 2019-11-26
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:20:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21567532
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/herwhiteknight/pseuds/herwhiteknight
Summary: Yang makes Blake feel safe. Safe enough to explore and to be whoever she wants. Even if it's scary at the start.
Relationships: Blake Belladonna/Yang Xiao Long
Series: inktober 19 [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1517693
Comments: 14
Kudos: 178





	even still

**Author's Note:**

> inktober prompt: freeze
> 
> beware, i've been taking these prompts and spinning them however my gay lill heart desires, so. this one is especially more abstract.

Yang caught Blake staring at herself in the mirror out of the corner of her eye. She was topless, absently running her fingers through her long hair. "Enjoying the view?" Yang smirked as she finished towelling her hair dry as she stepped out of the bathroom, steam swirling around her.

Blake whirled around at Yang's voice, arms crossing over her bare breasts, clearly startled. Yang frowned at the reaction, immediately aware that something was wrong. "You're done early," was all Blake said, eyes flicking over to the bathroom door.

"Yeah well," Yang said, keeping her tone light as she approached Blake. "I was hoping you could towel my hair dry. It's always softer when you do it." _And because I want to pull you out of whatever's going on in your head right now_.

"Oh," Blake blinked, shook her head slightly, as if to shake off the clouds. A small smile lifted her lips, and Yang mirrored it, reaching out her hand to pull her forward. "Yes of course, I'd love to."

She let Yang lead her back into the bathroom, hopping up onto her place on the counter as Yang settled on the stool, her back settling against Blake's knees. "Thanks baby," she grinned more broadly, turning to pass Blake the only Yang-approved brush in their household. She caught sight of Blake gathering up Yang's still damp hair in one hand, still shirtless. 

But as Blake set the brush to her hair, she decided to just let it go and closed her eyes. Blake would tell her if she wanted. Blake always did, after a time. She often just needed safety and space. And warmth. All of which Yang was more than happy to provide.

After a few minutes of gentle silence in which Yang nearly drifted off under Blake’s soft ministrations, the calming tug of the brush through her locks with the occasional finger-thread feel as Blake separated sections for ease of labour, Blake spoke up. “I’ve been looking at my body lately,” she murmured.

Yang let her concern stay at the forefront of her thoughts, sensing that there was a heaviness to that statement. “Yeah?” she prompted, allowing Blake to take the conversation where she wanted, but letting her know that she was listening.

The brush paused mid-stroke in Yang’s hair. “I just… Yang,” Blake said, her words dropping even lower now, syllables catching in the shrouding mist that still clung to the bathroom surfaces. “Do you still love me?”

Yang felt her heart drop at the question. It’d been awhile since a conversation like this was brought out, and even then it was only dragged to the surface after nightmares, when Adam was still a bloody scar on their hands. She reached behind herself, lifting the brush from Blake’s hand and turning to face her girlfriend in one smooth motion. “Hey,” Yang said, setting the brush aside and taking Blake’s hands gently in hers as she gazed up at her. “ _I love you_. I don’t know what’s going on in your head that’s making you doubt that, but whatever it is, I will still love you. I always will. Even if you don’t want to tell me right now, or even if you do. I love you with everything I have, baby.”

Blake’s eyes watered and her lips bent sharply in a frown - and it was a look Yang never thought she’d see again. The one of _wanting_ so dearly to trust, but the external promises were so distant, so locked away behind the built up walls of Blake’s own mind. A heavy tear shattered on their joined hands, hot with guilt. Shame. A deep, shaky inhale, her eyes squeezed shut. And-

“ _I don’t feel right in my skin.”_

The confession landed amongst the tears and Blake pulled her hands back to angrily scuff at the tracks that carved down her cheeks. “I don’t… _know_ how else to explain it, _why_ it’s all so different _now_ but I never… I never could _think_ for myself with... with _him,_ I-”

Yang stood, nearly knocking over her stool just to wrap Blake in her arms with the warmest hug. “You’re safe,” Yang reassured her, rocking her gently back and forth in her arms. “You’re safe with me, alright?”

Blake nuzzled deeper into Yang’s embrace, allowing the warm breath from Yang’s words to ghost over her ear, and to take comfort in that. “I know I am,” she replied automatically, but the immediacy of the answer was no longer out of a desire to placate, to end confrontation as meekly as possible. It was borne and risen out of a pure truth that Yang had shown her time and time again. She _was_ safe. _So maybe that was why…_

“It’s been a couple of days like this,” Blake admitted softly, pulling out of the embrace only so she could catch the vulnerability in Yang’s eyes and hope that it was matching her own. She met her gaze, and saw the mirrored truth there. “I’ll… put on a shirt, or.. get out of the shower and start drying my hair and everything feels… shifted. Nothing’s quite wrong,” Blake murmured, taking Yang’s hand gently in her own and placing it over her breast. There was no sexual spark - not that a touch like this hadn’t ever elicited that reaction before - but rather a curiosity. What she wished for sometimes, what she thought about. What she wanted to stay. “But nothing’s quite _right_ , either.”

Yang glanced up from beneath her lashes at Blake, still sitting on the counter, hair tousled and air-drying, skin still slightly pink from the shower she’d taken before Yang. _The shower she’d insisted on taking alone._ Pieces started to settle into place as Yang dipped lower to kiss her collarbone before holding out her hands to Blake, palms up. “Come here,” she said, and Blake readily slid her hands into Yang’s as she helped her down from the counter.

Yang pulled her into a hug once again, pressing their bodies impossibly close for a long moment. Then she kissed Blake’s cheek and whispered, “Do you trust me?”

With the same immediacy as before, “Yes.”

“Then let me take care of you,” Yang murmured, shifting her arms so that she cradled Blake around her thighs and, with a single smooth motion, hefted her securely into her arms. “I want to show you something,” Yang smiled as Blake let out a little giggle of surprise at Yang's antics even as she hooked her legs around Yang's waist, settling her arms around Yang’s shoulders loosely.

“Yang, what are you-”

“Just a second,” Yang grinned even more broadly, taking her back out to their bedroom, back to the mirror that had started the conversation in the first place. She set her gently back down on her own two feet, and turned towards it herself so that they were both facing their own reflections.

And as Blake gave her reflection another long, critical look, Yang slipped her arm around her waist, and pointed. “Do you know I see, Blake?” she asked, keeping her eyes on Blake’s within the glass.

Painful words danced on her tongue, but she held them back. She knew that whatever Yang was going to say would immediately shatter the untruths that could’ve possibly spilled from her lips at that moment. “Tell me,” she just whispered, leaning closer into Yang’s arms.

“I see someone whose soul is more lovely than the way they look on the outside. Don’t get me wrong babe,” Yang laughed, unable to help herself, “you’re a total smokeshow, obviously.” Blake giggled, allowing her gaze to be torn away from her reflection. And to turn her attention fully onto Yang in that moment. 

Yang turned away from the mirror too, because none of it mattered. _Blake_ mattered. “But what makes you gorgeous. What makes you beautiful. Handsome. Whatever word you feel like you wanna use… it’s not how you present yourself, you know that right? I love you for _who_ you are. And I will love you even still, no matter how you feel like you want to look, or how you want to be. I’ll be here for you. For all of it.” 

Blake couldn’t even find words past the relief, the happiness, the joy and the gratitude that clogged her throat in that moment. So she just pulled Yang in close and held her as her barest, truest self. And let her tears speak for her.


End file.
